Failing doesn’t make you a failure
It comes a time in your life when you need to realize the path you’ve chosen is not the right one. it wasn’t a mistake but it wasn’t meant to be either. That it’s time to change and it doesn’t mean you failed.
For the past year, I was involved in a side business that could potentially turn into a nice side income. It involved me starting at the very bottom, with training and funds to steadily move up to the place where money was to be made. Had a decent start but I began to fall behind on the second month, a sense of entitlement made me believe I was just going to breeze through and get to the top without putting the effort or the hours agreed upon the contract.
Took me 6 months to understand how wrong was my mindset. Only then, I could start working my way back up the right way.
Fast-forward to March when the first 5 days blackout happened in the country. Communications and electricity only lasted one week after that and found myself yet again without internet or any way to put in hours. To top it off, during those brief hours of internet connection I managed to lose my 3rd reload.
After some talks, I was released from my contract due to the uncertainty of my situation in the country.
I already knew it was going to happen, even understood completely the decision, but couldn’t help feeling like a failure at the beginning. I had devoted a lot of time, energy and effort into the project only to see my plan crumble before my eyes.
Then it hit me.
I wasn’t a failure, this was just one experience in which I did learn a lot. Things didn’t work out this time? Maybe it was time to reassess, take a break and explore another of my interests. I’ve listened enough to Gary Vaynerchuk’s podcast to understand that 29 is still very young and, as long as I continue putting in the work, I can still make something for myself.
One of the core ideas of stoicism is to focus on the things we can control and not worry about outside forces outside of our control, to practice mindfulness. In his Meditations, Marcus Aurelius said “You have power over your own mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength”.
We can’t change the problems or situations we face on a daily basis but we can change the way we look at them. Our perception of those circumstances and the way we react to them, define the result in the end.
Took me a while to finally understand that even though the cards were stacked against me, it was my choice to see it as an opportunity for growth.
Had plans to publish something new at least once per week and my excuse was the lack of internet but when I checked my notes there wasn’t anything new.
It was my choice to procrastinate instead of working on a new piece, to spend most of my free time watching movies or playing video games instead of journaling, to stare at the roof instead of finish reading a book.
The bottom line is this: if you’re not putting the hours you are not allowed to complain. You’ll make mistakes along the way and fail several times, but only when you choose to give up you can consider yourself a failure. If that’s not the case, get yourself back up and continue working.
If you’re interested in poker and want to follow my journey through the microstakes you can follow me here.
